Q&A: Invitations: Addressing One to a Member of the Military?

Q:

How do you address an outer envelope if the husband and wife are both in the military? What if only the husband is?

A:

For couples where both spouses serve, you’ve got a few options depending on how much room you have on your envelopes and whether or not the couple serves in the same branch of the military:

Captains Jerome and Miranda Simonsen

U.S. Army

etc.

Captain Jerome Simonsen,
U.S. Army

Captain Miranda Simonsen,
U.S. Navy

etc.

The inside envelope would say:

The Captains Simonsen

For a couple where only the husband is in the military, as much as we hate that Dr. and Mrs. thing — it’s so out of date — it seems the easiest way to go when you have a military man with a complicated title and a wife in the mix. For example, if you have Lieutenant Robert K. Jones, U.S. Navy, you could address your invite to Lieutenant and Mrs. Robert K. Jones, U.S. Navy. (The inside envelope would say Lieutenant and Mrs. Jones.) But if this patriarchal tradition bugs you as much as it bugs us (or you just think it’s awkward to put the Mrs. inside this long title), you could do it this way on the outer envelope:

Lieutenant Robert K. Jones, U.S. Navy
Barbara Jones

It all depends on how traditional you want to be. Both ways are completely acceptable.

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