What comes first, finding your dream venue or finalizing your guest list? This is a tricky one, since it varies by couple and their priorities. Ideally, to sidestep any issues, we recommend doing these four planning tasks, in this order, before anything else: Set a budget, sketch a rough guest list, search for venues, then lock in a wedding date. The reason you should think about working this way is that generally, each of these tasks help inform the next. That’s not to say you can’t find a venue first then work backward to craft a guest list, or choose a non-negotiable date before looking for available venues.
But what if you’ve had your heart set on a beautiful venue that, it turns out, can’t squeeze both your extended families and three circles of friends (not to mention the catering staff, dance floor and a stage for the band)? If you’re really in love with one location and don’t want to budge, it doesn’t hurt to touch base with the site manager about your concerns. Depending on the configuration of the building and property, they might be able to make something work for you (like opening up the side doors to tack on a tented area, for example). The worst they could say is no, but at least you tried, right?
Otherwise, we hate to be the bearer of bad news, but you might just have to compromise in one area or the other. That could mean getting serious about trimming your guest list to suit a venue you can’t give up. On the flip side, it could mean doing a little research to find an equally special site that fits your party comfortably (remember, you should allot about 25 to 30 square feet per guest). You never know—you might end up finding a site even more amazing than the one you originally had your eye on, in which case, catering your venue to your guest list would end up being fate.
